If you like Pina Colada…

I’m growing increasingly excited about this weekend but there is still a cloud hanging over my head.

Sure, John-E and Lindsey are getting married and I’m super stoked but as soon as that’s over I’m heading to…

Mexico

Bleh.

Sorry to those who like Mexico, but my only experiences with Mexico have been crap.


I simply don’t enjoy paying off government employees in an effort to dodge being arrested and if I wanted to deal with gangs I’d simply take a short trip to South East San Diego.


If I’m going to throw myself through the dangers of foreign travel, I’d rather be wrongfully arrested and be able to say, ‘At least I got to see the Eiffel Tower!’ or ‘At least I got to tour the Louvre!’ but saying, ‘At least I got to haggle for this plaster Bart Simpson head piggy bank’ just doesn’t tickle my fancy.


And no taco is worth an $80 Baja bus fare and a 4+ hour drive.


But alas, I must go. In the event of my untimely death from ‘turf wars’, please bury me in the cheapest method possible – pine box… plastic wrap… tissue paper, whatever’s legal. I’m not afraid of worms.

Please be sure to identify my body. I’d hate to be sold to Venezuelan drug lords while a ‘medical use’ cadaver is buried under my headstone.

At least I have very good dental records.