Monday, August 27, 2007

Oh come on! They don’t call me a whiner for nothing!!

When Chris and I first started our search for a home we were VERY concerned about the size of the yard. We even turned down a brand new home because the yard was tiny – well that and it was in El Cajon. I have standards.

Stop it with the Santee/Santucky/Clantee jokes before you start.

If you’ve seen our house, you know we have a fairly good sized backyard. A fairly good sized yard that looks more like a compost pile than a landscape architect’s dream.

As I worked for hours outside this weekend I wondered over and over…


I ruined a pair of jeans, tore a tank top, and got sweat in my eyes!

Let’s not even talk about my sunburn with a cute little armband of white left by my Ipod holder.

Don’t worry, there are some redeeming qualities.

1.) Weight loss.
2.) Great natural hair highlights.

Thursday, August 23, 2007

First day jitters….

Cooking class started on Tuesday. I’m really excited about it and I found myself looking over the syllabus with a strange glee. Why strange? I thought my passions were more on the eating side of the food spectrum and way less on the making it.

The teacher is incredibly full of himself. When the ‘let me take a moment to tell you a little about myself’ lasts 40 minutes and can be summed up with ‘I think I’m the greatest’ - it’s a problem. He was sure to let us know several times that he was religious. I wanted to let him know that being religious means you believe IN God, not that you believe you ARE one.

Despite my excitement, I struggled to stay awake. Our bedroom ceiling fan has recently started sounding like a kazoo playing March of the Bees (or maybe the Dora the Explorer theme song, I’m just not sure)… loudly. I’m a light sleeper so it keeps me up all night. I would ask Chris to fix it but finding time between full time school, full time work, and remodeling a bathroom, it isn’t in the cards. Where’s a landlord when you need him!!??

Chris is showing an excitement about school too… but hardly for the same reasons. He was hit on by a 17 year old anorexic in training. I gave him a hug hello when he came home from school last night and could smell the cologne he doesn’t even wear for me anymore. Hmm. Someone’s interested in impressing the ladies!

You know what? We aren’t permitted to wear rings in cooking class because of the danger of bacteria getting into the settings. All I have to say to Chris is this… GAME ON BUDDY!

I went to see my doctor before school on Tuesday. I really think they should have you fill out a checklist before getting on the scale and it should look like this:

Long hair - ½ pound
Shoes – ½ pound
Clothes – 1 pound
Just ate a big meal – ¾ pound
Drank lots of water – ½ pound
You thought the new ‘veggie’ chips were healthy and downed the whole bag – 8 pounds
(turns out… fried potatoes are veggies too)

They should let you check off all that apply and subtract that from what you weigh.

Maybe then I’ll actually weigh what I tell Chris I weigh.

‘I’m 110 honey I swear!’

I’m on to you 17 year old anorexic in training….

Sure you may ACTUALLY weight 110, but on technicalities… I’m right there with ya.

AND… for all who are interested – Mike is out fighting fires in LA. He had to drive 8 miles to get cell service and tell us he was OK. He’s currently on the front lines and defending structures. But don’t feel too bad, he sleeps in an air-conditioned trailer.

A little prayer for his safety would be nice if you don’t mind.

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Silly Colegate

So Nicole has a poll on the left side of her BLOG.

Go check it out.

Vote and vote often.

Monday, August 20, 2007


Chris went with John-E and Lindsey to the Charger practice and they took little miss Keira. I absolutely love this picture.

Someday, he'll be an awesome dad.

Friday, August 17, 2007

Excuse me, HOW much is that?!?!

Chris and I went out last night to purchase a shower door. We’ve been looking around and have had some serious difficulty finding a door for our awkward shower opening size.

I was adamant against clear glass. I’ve heard horror stories of the effort it takes to keep them clean and as a person who struggles to keep my home clean in general, it didn’t seem like the best decision. Well that, and the two men in my life are hardly capable of taking 3 seconds to pull the cheap shower curtain back into place, I’d be an idiot to hope they would take 5 minutes to squeegee.

Unfortunately, the ONLY in-stock size we could find was clear glass. Oh, the dears offered to special order us the doors we wanted… for $160 more. But the problem was - we already had to offer them our first born for the in-stock model, now they wanted the knee caps of our second child. I had to draw the line somewhere…

Unfortunately for our second born, my limit isn’t until the elbows.

Sorry sweetheart!


We went with the clear glass. We’re broke and I’ve learned that settling isn’t so bad.

I think I’ll go buy one of those 3 foot squeegees from a professional window cleaner.

On top of all that, I MAY have been a bit moody last night – I’ve been forced to diet.

We’ve got this delicious bin of Peanut M & M’s at the office. I’d plunder the stash at least 3 or 4 times a day… until I realized how many sets of hands went into that thing.

Suddenly I was overwhelmed with the thought about the quantity of germs in there. So overwhelmed, that I became intensely interested in who did and who did not wash their hands after they used the restroom.

Frankly, I don’t know what kind of obsessive compulsive psychopath makes tiny tears in the bathroom dry towels to see who is and who is not a believer in hand sanitization. What kind of crazy do you have to be to …

Oh who am I kidding. I totally did that. But you guys don’t understand my desperate NEED for Peanut M & M’s!!!

And the results?

If I get the inkling for a Peanut M & M’s, I’m buying my own.

Perhaps this forced diet by means of germaphobia will be good for me.

Maybe I’ll be a little less J. Lo, a little more Cameron Diaz.

Just be glad you don’t work with me.

Thursday, August 16, 2007

A Peek...

... of the master bath remodel so far.

The shower was grouted after I took this picture.
We're getting there. Slowly, but it's coming along...

You! Yes, you. Please step into my office…

I’m not sure why but I’m seemingly turning into a ferocious beast.

We recently had an office ‘vacated’ and as the not so proud owner of a cubicle near the bathrooms, you can bet I was vying for the new space before the exiting body was even cold.

I begged, I pleaded, and in the end…

Will you please step into my office?

I’m not sure why I like those words so much… other than it means I have an office… with a real door.

In other ferocious news, I’m not a big fan of unnecessary violence against animals. If you plan on eating them… go right ahead but otherwise, be nice.

Well… that was before I owned a yard and had to PAY to replace dead plants.

Suddenly I’ve got the itch to tear gopher heads off and burn the dead bodies.

I’ve decided to do Fall Foliage tours in my backyard. The difference is, photosynthesis will not be involved like back east – in my yard, decomposition gives the leaves the yellow hue.

Proceeds from the tour will be used to purchase new plants... and bulk poison.

I’m working on planning Chris and my anniversary trip. We were going to do Kauai this year but Chris can’t be gone more than 4 days (stupid school & dedication to good grades) and by the time you get a 5.5 hour flight in there, you’d have no time left - so we’re staying local…ish. I’m thinking – the wine country.


Temecula isn’t the wine country??!?!

Well, regardless, I’m still figuring out what to do within a 1-2 hour flight or drive. I really can’t think of anything exciting in AZ, OR, or NV. And NO, Vegas isn’t an anniversary trip folks. So Trampy!!

Monday, August 6, 2007

Perhaps that song isn’t appropriate at work…

I attended two meetings in L.A. last week. They went well and I’m hoping for some good results over the next few weeks.

I guess I need to brush up my ‘small group professional skills’ a bit more though; I’m a bit out of practice.

First, I turned a bright shade of red every time I had to speak. I can handle large groups like a champ… it’s the 15 or less that makes me nervous. Perhaps if I had a tan this wouldn’t be a big deal, but my nearly translucent skin hides absolutely nothing.

Next time – turtle neck.

Second, I forgot to turn off my cell phone at the meeting on Friday. Midway through, the chimes started going off. I pushed every button and held down the power but the darn thing just kept dinging! The phone finally turned off and all I kept thinking was - thank heavens it wasn’t Chris.

Every time he calls, ‘You Give Love a Bad Name’ blares.

Chris jokingly told me that if we ever got divorced, he would sue me for alimony.

Knowing he would, knowing my family would be on his side of the courtroom, and knowing he’d win, I told him, ‘While my love for you may fade, my love for my money never will. I will stay by your side forever’ and that was the night Jon Bon Jovi started singing Chris’ ring tone.

And people wonder how we keep the romance alive…

Wait. What?!?!

Last Saturday I returned almost all the clothes I bought in ‘therapy’ last week. It’s not that I didn’t need them, I just feel so guilty about spending money I always end up returning things.

The saleslady asked for my driver’s license so she could fill out some paperwork. I kept repeating in my head, ‘Remember ID, Remember ID, Remember ID’ because they ALWAYS forget to give it back.

And I did remember my ID …

Three days later when I went to show it after using my debit card and realized it was missing.

Good thing I had cash. Who knew those movie theater guys were such ID Nazi’s?

On Wednesday, I drove all the way to the mall, hiked up to the top floor, and approached the customer service counter,

‘Hi, I called last night. My name’s Rebekah Atk…’

‘Oh yes. I answered the phone,’ she interrupted, ‘I’ll get your card for you. Do you have ID?’

‘It is my ID’ I laughed.

‘Oh geez!’ She laughed back.

‘Do you have any other ID?’ she asked when she returned holding my treasured California License.

‘You mean instead of the picture ID you are holding?’ I asked trying to take out the bite of sarcasm.

‘Yes’ she said flatly.

I dug through my wallet and pulled out my 3 year old college photo ID card that looks noticeably LESS like me than the ID she was holding (I was going through a short hair phase and quickly realized I had WAY too much ‘volume’ – OK, it was frizz but volume sounds better - for short hair).

She stared at my picture for a long time then reluctantly handed my ID over.

And here I thought McDonalds and Burger King were the only businesses kind enough to employ the mentally challenged.